Still On Representation

From BBC.co.uk

This past weekend, I saw Stick Fly, a play produced by Alicia Keys, featuring Dule Hill, Mekhi Phifer, and Tracie Thoms. I can't say that I loved it, or that I even thought it was *good*, but I am absolutely glad I got to see it. Out of the literally hundreds of shows on Broadway, there are about *three* featuring (or written by) PoC.

As I mentioned, I wasn't crazy about some of the things in this play (for a show about family, I would have included mothers on the stage, and I would not have silenced a woman for speaking truth, but that's just me), but I truly appreciated this writer's humor, characterization, psychological depth, and frank dialogue on race dynamics, class, and colorism among the African-American elite. It's her perspective, her contribution, and I can respect that.

As I thought about it later, I wondered again, what it would be like to see more representations of PoC, in all our myriad expressions, on center screen, on the main stage, in the spotlight. How differently would we navigate life? What new possibilities would we conjure up? What new opportunities would we see that now elude us?

Even after multiple shining reviews in other cities, Stick Fly took almost six years to make it to Broadway for lack of funding and support. I thought about how many wonderful, brilliant stories there are out there that will never see the light of day because there is no financial backing for them. This story was not how I would have written a story about family, but it was a good story that deserved to be on stage -- on Broadway -- nonetheless. How many others are out there just like it, waiting for a producer's approval, an editor's nod, a bookstore's/reviewer's stamp? And how many will never get that nod because the person reading/viewing the story doesn't relate to it, or simply can't see themselves in it?

And then, this morning, I read this post on Zoetrope, about the "dead girl" look on some YA book covers, and I was reminded, once again, that the struggle for representation continues on all fronts.

But I was heartened by this BBC article about Indian youth wanting to see their own faces on stage. Whereas before, the preference was for white faces on the stage, young Indians now want to see their own images and values reflected back to them, in all their unique beauty and complexity. And the result is a uniquely Indian sound, exploding onto the Indie music scene.

History has shown us that independent thinkers/musicians/artists have paved the way for sweeping social and cultural change. I think we're in the midst of some of that same sweeping change here, too, with the balance of power shifting. It's exciting...like we're on the cusp of something very significant, very important. It's slow going, yes, but I'm in it for the long haul.

Open Heart/Closed Fist

On Thursday, June 9th, I will be on a panel for SAWCC (South Asian Women's Creative Collective) called "Open Heart/Closed Fist: Sikh Women Speak Out on Faith and Feminism." It'll be at the Asian American Writers' Center at 7pm. There's more information on the SAWCC website, but here's the blurb:

From the Middle East to the Midwest, revolution is spreading.  Women of all faiths have joined radicals in solidarity, even as their own rights come under fire by conservative elements.  But besides the images we see—women in hijab with their fists raised in Tahrir Square; women of all races with their fists raised in Madison—what about the women we don’t see, women who advocate for themselves and their sisters in the homes, gurudwaras, mosques, and temples?  What does it mean to be religious and radical? 

In this panel, author Neesha Meminger (Jazz in Love), community organizer Tejpreet Kaur (Sikh Coalition), and blogger Simran Kaur (thelangarhall.com) will discuss the ways in which their work explores issues of faith and feminism, particularly in the diaspora.

I'm delighted to be on this panel and super excited to meet my co-panelists. I think women of all backgrounds struggle with this concept of allegiance--when do I speak out? Who gets thrown under the bus if I raise this issue? Usually the answer is "me." But because girls everywhere are taught to first think of others, then ourselves, or to be compliant, acquiescent, "good" girls, the struggle to speak up and speak out rages strong within.

I think it's going to be an awesome panel. Please join us if you can.

What's Going On

I've been meaning to post updates on my recent signing/reading events, but there is too much going on and I've allowed myself to become buried. But here are a few quick updates until I find time to do longer and more, um, picturesque (?) posts . . .

The Queens reading was absolutely lovely. Meeting teen readers is always a joy, but I've wanted to read in Queens, especially, since it has one of the largest immigrant populations in NYC. The class of pre-GED students we met with was one hundred percent teens of colour. Seriously. Every last one of them.

And the panel of readers? All white - and me. I couldn't help but wonder how many times a day those students see people who look nothing like them with a platform to freely express their opinions, values, ideas, and creative vision. I know what it was like for me as a teen, and then how powerful it was to finally see women of color speaking their truth boldly and without fear--and provided with a space to do so. Melina Marchetta was reading next to me and spoke beautifully, not just as an ally, but as a woman who could relate to the feeling of being "other" in a place you call home.

Here we are, above, at the Cupcake Cafe which adjoins Books of Wonder.

Speaking of which, I apologize to anyone who showed up at Books of Wonder and couldn't find copies of Jazz in Love. I'm not sure what the snafu was there, but for some reason my books did not arrive.  I will be there again on May 14th for the Diversity in YA tour, so please stop by then!

In non-writerly news, the whole Chris Brown/Rihanna thing has been really upsetting for me. Even more so than the Charlie Sheen thing. Maybe it's because my girls and so, so many teen girls of colour are hooked in to popular culture and idolize these icons. And my girls, in particular, have many questions I'm always flailing to answer in a way that makes sense to them. Or maybe it's because the dynamics of that relationship are so familiar to me. I don't know.

But things like this help - if you haven't read Daniel Jose Older's piece on Racialicious about men's violence against women, do so now. He also had some great tweets about the topic yesterday - one of which was, "Batterers control anger by not lashing out at judges, cops, their homies, etc. They control it & direct it at their spouses," and the following one, "So u can do all the anger management classes u want but ur just feeding the problem until u instill a foundation of respect towards women."

Chris Brown's recent actions highlight violence against women in our society in stark relief, and are a reminder of the way the Creative Life Force has so brutally been taken hostage in our world. I have to keep telling myself that the fight is raging strong. That more and more people are waking up. Hard to tell sometimes, but I think it's true.

What Happens If

The South Asia Solidarity Initiative has put forward a response to this TIME Magazine article titled, "What Happens If We Leave Afghanistan." With the strong emotional response an image like that of Aisha on the cover of TIME elicits, it's especially important to read other takes on the issue. Sometimes we get so overwhelmed by strong emotional responses (and the image of Aisha certainly draws justified rage and sheer devastation), that we don't take the time to see the full picture.

Certainly read TIME's post, if you feel so inclined. But then go and read the response to it -- here is an excerpt:

The August 9, 2010 issue of TIME magazine featured a striking cover photograph of an 18-year-old Afghan woman, Aisha, who was disfigured by the Taliban last year.  The cover title read, “What happens if we leave Afghanistan.”  While Aisha’s story and the stories of many other women like her may depict some part of the reality of women’s lives under the Taliban, TIME’s conclusion that continuing the U.S. occupation of Afghanistan is necessary, is highly misleading and troubling. [. . .]

For the last decade, the occupying forces of the U.S. and its NATO allies have nourished warlords and supported a corrupt government, leading many to join the Taliban and increasing their influence across Afghanistan. Increased civilian deaths, a fundamentalist resurgence, and deadly bombing raids have led to a devastated country and a Taliban stronger than ever before. TIME’s claim to “illuminate what is actually happening on the ground” falsely equates the last decade of occupation with progress. The occupation has not and will not bring democracy to Afghanistan, nor will it bring liberation to Afghan women. Instead, it has exacerbated deep-seated corruption in the government, the widespread abuse of women’s rights and human rights by fundamentalists, including Karzai’s allies, and stymied critical infrastructure development in the country. The question should not be “what happens if we leave Afghanistan,” the question should be “what happened when we invaded Afghanistan” and “what happens if we stay in Afghanistan.”

Racism and Misogyny are often used against one another, to justify the existence of one over the other. In this case, "protecting the women" seems to be the guise under which US racism and imperialism justify their presence. The truth is that both racism and misogyny go hand in hand. Where there is one, the other always lurks nearby.

Read the rest of SASI's response here.

On Security

Olugbemisola tweeted the TED site today for a revisit of Adichie's "single story" video. While there, I also ended up watching Eve Ensler's talk on security. It's very interesting and not super long. Check it out . . .

Fangirl Crush

I love Sheila Chandra. Her story is inspiring, her voice is magic, and she has this total earth-mother-goddess vibe. She has no classical training in music and, as a child, she practiced singing so that her voice would be ready when the opportunity came. This is from the bio on her website:

"Born in South London to a South Indian immigrant family, Sheila Chandra discovered her voice at the age of twelve and whilst at Theatre Arts school. From this moment her chosen path was to be a singer. Lacking any real contacts or access to the music business, she nevertheless honed her vocal skills as a labour of love, spending up to two hours a night throwing her voice into the tall, draughty and uncarpeted stairwell of the family home: 'I didn’t know how to manufacture an opportunity, but I was determined that when a chance came my way I would be ready.'"

Don't you just love that? She is an artist's artist - constantly scrapping everything and starting from scratch, transforming herself and her art, and stitching new styles together as she goes along. *Very* inspiring.

I just came across this early video of her beatboxing, in the ancient, Indian style . . . 

Music Videos: Whose Fantasy Is It?

ETA: I seem to be experiencing #bloggerfail. Some people are not able to view the trailer for some reason, so here's a link to where you can watch it. It's definitely worth watching. If you're feeling squeamish, please keep in mind that these are mass media images. Music videos are the common language of young people, and children as young as nine and ten years old are watching these images, digesting them, and incorporating them into their ideas of who they are and how relationships are constructed.

Okay, EVERYONE WATCH THIS TRAILER. Then get every high school/college/university teacher you know to purchase a copy and screen it for their students. I had to watch the whole thing on Youtube because the price was a bit steep for me, but if your school or organization can purchase it, it's WELL worth it to get young people thinking critically about what they're consuming - and how those images/messages shape their ideas of who they are . . . If you're having trouble seeing it here, go to this link. The video was written and directed by Sut Jhally, Ph.D. Dr. Jhally is a professor of Communication at the University of Massachusetts at Amherst, and Founder and Executive Director of the Media Education Foundation.

Since I'm having trouble embedding the trailer, here is part one (of seven) of the video . . .

More on Race

There's a thoughtful post on race in children's publishing here. I really am glad these discussions are now taking place on blogs and forums where folks with decision-making power might pay careful attention. I also love that more and more editors are looking for work by authors of colour. It's certainly a step in the right direction.

However, I've heard more than one editor say that, while they've thrown their doors wide to submissions by PoC, the work they're receiving seems to be sub-par, not polished, or in need of more work than they have time for in this highly competitive business.

I have a couple of thoughts on that. PoC have not had the same opportunities and privileges that white folks have had for hundreds of years in many parts of the world. To expect equal results from white writers and writers of colour when there has never been a level playing field in terms of economics, social and political power, representation and privilege, is to set oneself up for disappointment and to perpetuate the dynamics already in place.

When I was a more idealistic version of who I am today, I went to work at a women's shelter. I felt strongly about domestic violence and I was a young feminist and I wanted to help. I had never grown up around domestic violence so I was unprepared for what I'd encounter. And it wasn't pretty. I had to learn a whole lot, FAST. It was eye-opening, it was brutal, and it was excruciatingly painful to see just how deep misogyny and patriarchy run in our world. But it was necessary. It showed me the Truth. And the Truth is one of the most solid tools you can have in navigating through life.

If you are a publishing decision-maker who wants to do the right thing by publishing or selling more titles by authors of colour, brava!! But you have to know that there is work to be done. The way the system is currently set up, writers of colour must bend and distort our work so that it is recognizable and appealing to white editors. Editors are not required to bend their reality or lens so that they can understand and relate to the styles, traditions, and aesthetics of PoC. So our work is always judged through a white lens. And the work is read and judged based on whether it will appeal to a white readership. The default assumption is that only brown folks will want to read work written by brown folks. And that white readership is the goal. This is problematic on so many levels.

If you want to create true, lasting change, you can't go in thinking you can keep doing what you've always done, only now it will be with brown faces. Dr. Phil (sorry) says the definition of insanity is to keep doing what you've always done and hope for different results each time (what can I say - my mom is a devoted watcher). It's not the same. There are very real differences between white writers and writers of colour, heterosexual writers and LGBTQ writers, writers who've grown up with lots of money and those who've grown up with without - differences that have painful histories behind them, and sometimes the results are not pretty.

This is the same discussion feminists were having years ago when men ran and owned all publishing houses, and women's writing was not taken seriously. It was too "emotional", it was too "flowery", women didn't write about "serious" things, and women weren't getting published. Men were viewing women's writing through a very male lens and never had to bend or shift their perspective. It was out of this that feminist presses and women's presses began sprouting and taking root. They showed that women could write and there was a market for that work and that it sold. Eventually, these small presses began dying out because the larger publishers began publishing more work by women. AND because there were now spaces for women to write, to nurture and cultivate their careers, there were grants and financial support for women who wanted to take writing seriously. In other words, there were larger, societal changes *in addition to* well-meaning editors. AND, here's the key, there were more women editors.

The children's/teen publishing biz has a whole LOT of women editors now. And two of them are women of colour. Ha, just kidding. It might be five. But the same needs to happen now. This is a subjective business. Editors and booksellers can like whatever they like. Let's just get more - including those who understand and value different aesthetics and traditions, and those who aren't necessarily looking for a polished, refined, brown version of Twilight or Harry Potter or Gossip Girl. Let's think outside of the publishing box we've all been shoved into. Let's get representation of ALL children and their histories/stories. Even if it means taking a little more time to nurture a new writer or new voice, or reading everything you can in a particular genre by authors from different backgrounds and literary traditions.

These are important and necessary changes. Painful, eye-opening ones, too. They might show some of us just how deep the roots of racism run in this country. But they may also show us something more important: the Truth. And that is invaluable in all of our journeys.

Progress

Last night, I met one of my closest friends - who was in from San Francisco for the book expo - for dinner. We sat in the meat-packing district near her hotel and stared in utter dismay at the scene around us. It was a TUESDAY, people. And women were out in full Saturday night gear, with super-short, super-tight miniskirts, clutching the arm of their partner or bff as they hobbled around in shoes like these:

Yes, friends. Stipper-chic seems to be the hottest trend right now on the runways and in the streets. Ah, progress. Obviously, discussions of feminism in today's world are as obsolete as discussions of racism in a post-racial US (/sarcasm).

First Female Indian Idol

I love this and just had to share. The star of the video below is Sourabhee Debbarma, winner of Indian Idol '09. She's twenty-four, the first female to win Indian Idol, and according to her wiki entry, she is of Twipra descent (the indigenous people of the Tripura region).

It's not until I actually see these that I realize how hungry I am for images like this, and also this--where brown people are not just in the picture to educate about race/racism, to be studied, to be tokens, or as a splash of colour in an otherwise all-white landscape*. I love seeing this young woman have her spotlight on a show that dominates the cultural airwaves the world over, and in a context where she can just BE.

She's beautiful, isn't she? Though if she'd grown up with someone like my dad, she'd have heard this her whole life: "EAT. Or we're going to have to weigh you down on windy days. Eat MORE. [headshake] You don't eat enough..."

*I know Indians have their own tokens and "to-be-studied" groups--plenty of bigotry, racism, and downright supremacy abounds on the subcontinent. No arguments there. However, this post is within the context of North American media and images - and PoC within those frameworks.

Being Effective

A few weeks back, Girls Write Now hosted a fantastic guest at one of their workshops - Katie Orenstein of the Op-ed Project. She's a wonderful speaker - witty, clear, engaging. She spoke about some of the reasons women might not contribute to the Op-ed sections of newspapers like the NY Times, the Washington Post and other large scale distribution newspapers. Here's a summary of the problem according to the site:

"The op-ed pages of our nation’s newspapers are overwhelmingly dominated—80% or more—by men. Because the op-ed pages feed all other media, the under-representation of women here perpetuates and exaggerates the under-representation of women in larger ways. For example, men are:

• 84% of guests on influential Sunday morning political talk shows on TV
• 85% of Hollywood producers
• 85% of nonfiction books on The New York Times best-selling
• 85-90% of radio producers
• 83% of congress

In short, public debate all but excludes half the population."

Interesting stats, no? Says quite a lot about how far we still have to go in the push for equal representation--on oh-so-many fronts.

One of the (other) interesting things Katie said during her presentation that really stuck with me, and that I think is applicable to blogging and many other things as well, is that she learned a hard lesson after one particular piece she wrote about Sex and the City. She realized, after the onslaught of letters and emails she received (from unhappy readers) in response to the piece, that she had quite possibly alienated four out of five of her readers. And that's when it struck her that perhaps it was more important to be effective rather than right.

True in so many areas of life - from blogging to receiving feedback on one's writing, to dealing with friends and partners, to communicating with children and teens... One of the things I try to keep in mind when I'm in the heat of the moment - when I'm angry and passionate about something (whether it's with my spouse, kids, friends, on the blog, whatever) or when my buttons have been pushed and it's hard to see beyond my own indignation - is that my goal is not to vent, it is to be effective. To grow, to push for change, create awareness and help build some sort of connection.

Thanks, Katie, for reminding me of the difference, and for spotlighting an important area more women can become active - an area that can help shape the world around us to reflect the sets of values and priorities of an entire population, not just a select few.

Some Thoughts on Bullying

[ETA: apologies for the long-ass post. I wrote it over a week and with great care, hoping to get it right. This is an issue I feel strongly about and would love to generate more critical, thoughtful dialogue around. The next few posts will be bite-sized, I promise, to make up for it ;)]

The topic of bullying has come up a lot lately and has taken up much of my mental real estate. The term "bullying" never sat right with me and I had to give it a good sitdown to figure out why. I guess it reminds me a bit of how the AIDS crisis didn't become a CRISIS until Rock Hudson or Magic Johnson came out with it. And then suddenly it had a name and a face that brought it home. Before then, it was countless folks in the gay community, and masses of black and brown people in Africa and India who were dying silently from a disease no one wanted to talk about.

That's how this bullying thing feels to me. Kids have been bullied forever. It's about abuse of power - something children learn is a sanctioned practice in our world. In the world around them, wealthy nations bully those nations with less monetary wealth by bringing them to their knees with debt and impossible-to-repay loans. In the world around our young people, women are bullied into living up to impossible standards of beauty - sometimes carving themselves up, or dying on operating tables to achieve those standards. Working parents are bullied into putting in too many hours for not enough pay while their children are in the hands of inadequate, underfunded childcare. Same-sex couples who've been together for decades are denied basic spousal rights. This is the world we live in with our children, and many are taught it is a right and just world where everything is fine. That nothing needs to be questioned and nothing needs to be challenged.

I think of some of the most recent cases of bullying to have made headlines--all ending in suicide or murder, after relentless abuse by their peers: Reena Virk, murdered; Matthew Shepard, murdered; Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover, suicide; Brandon Teena (upon whose story the film Boys Don't Cry was based), murdered; and most recently, Phoebe Prince, suicide. A brown girl, a gay white teen, a black middle-schooler (taunted for being gay), a lesbian reportedly planning sexual reassignment surgery, and an Irish female immigrant, respectively. Children are very astute. They record every detail and reflect it back. They learn early what is considered valuable in their world and what is devalued. They learn early what they can get away with devaluing and what they will be punished for devaluing. They learn, too, how to use their own power in the ways they see power being used and abused around them.

In every case I've read about bullying, and in my own experience, there were those adults and authority figures who were complicit in the bullying by either turning the other way, or tacitly approving the victimization. And then, of course, there are the systemic infrastructures that privilege some with unearned power over others while never requiring the privileged to acknowledge or even recognize their privilege - lulling them into believing that it is not only deserved, but right. And that those who don't have privilege don't deserve it or haven't earned it.

When I was growing up, we were all bullied - only then we called it racism, and our parents dared not name it for fear of any number of repercussions. Today, my eight-year-old gets bullied and there are "This Is A No-Bullying Zone" signs in the halls of her school. And yet, she is still bullied, and she's not the only one. I've talked to other parents as we agonized over how to deal with it. The toughest part is that, like many of her classmates, she often seeks the approval of the girls who treat her the worst. She wants to be liked by the girls who don't like her. Despite all our efforts at home, she looks out into the world and sees no reflection of her fierce little self. And then believes she's less-than. She comes home and wants to be blonde because, until last year, there were no brown princesses. And when I read about cases like Reena Virk's and Brandon Teena's, I wonder whether seeking approval from the very folks who view you as "lesser" is a common dynamic. And I think - why wouldn't it be, especially as children move up into middle and high school where social acceptance is survival?

So I stopped looking at the issue in terms of "how to stop bullying". I thought, instead, of that classic case of bullying - where a woman is married to a man who beats her. Again, here is a woman who wants to be liked - or in this case, loved - by someone who sees her as less-than. And I thought back to my days in shelters and on hotlines and at demonstrations...what did we do? What were the steps we took?

It was a multi-pronged, grassroots, bottom-up approach. We addressed the issue on many levels: personal, social, political, and economic. The first thing was to empower the woman. She had to believe she was valuable and worthy of better relationships. Next was to present her with options, while working to create more options (shelters, childcare, hotlines, etc.). Then, there was becoming a vocal advocate for women's rights and working, in whatever capacity, for systemic change; finding lawyers who would take pro-bono cases; creating childcare co-ops; and finding or creating affordable housing for single mothers. This wasn't about blaming the victim - it was about focusing on the woman who, very often, up until that point, was functioning in a system that considered her voiceless and unimportant--and empowering her. Then, there was lobbying for stricter punishments and laws for offenders. But this was *at the same time* as building the self-esteem of women and girls who were in abusive relationships and helping them to spot red flags before tragedy.

When I put this in the context of bullying or peer-terrorism among teens, I see how a multi-pronged approach could also be effective. So first, we start with empowering the kids who are easy targets - kids who are quiet, seen as different in some way, who don't fit easily into the mainstream. These would most likely be children and teens of colour, children and teens who don't fit into culturally accepted notions of "feminine" and "masculine", working class kids, etc. We help them find their voices. We help them see that even if their own parents don't see the beauty in them, there is great beauty there. Beauty worth defending and fighting for.

Perhaps this is where children's/MG/YA writers come in. Those of us who stir a little bit of activism into our work (whether we call it that or not) have been giving voice to the silenced since we started putting stories out into the world. It's part of what motivates us and the reason our writing is so important to us. It's the reason the Judy Blumes and S.E. Hintons meant so much to me when I was growing up - they created worlds where girls like me were okay, when we weren't okay in our own worlds. And it's the reason getting under-represented and marginalized voices into print, in the media, and in cultural products is so important. More stories means more perspectives means lots of different values out there.

Next, we present options. Maybe we set up a station at school where anyone who feels truly threatened can go with guaranteed privacy to talk to a qualified professional--a bullying expert of sorts. Someone well-versed in the issues, who has been trained to spot red flags and offer real support and solutions. Or maybe there's a hotline set up for teens and pre-teens to call anonymously if they know something is in the works or being planned against a fellow classmate; and for those who are going through bullying to call and talk to a supportive listener who can offer resources and places to turn if the adults around them aren't listening.

Then, becoming a vocal advocate for the rights of those children and teens who fall outside the margins and working toward systemic change. Again, authors, writers, agents, editors, booksellers, librarians, and other gatekeepers in the publishing industry can play a significant role here. In recent years, there have been more books by people of colour, LGBTQ writers, and working class authors than when I was coming up, but we have a long way to go. Part of empowering young people is to show them reflections of themselves as powerful, valuable, important members of their communities - no less deserving of privilege, love, wealth, dignity and respect than their peers. I know from experience that stories do that. Stories heal and mend and expand. Stories in books, stories in the news, stories in film, on television and in magazines. It's part of the reason I started writing to begin with. I read stories that showed me More. Showed me hope and possibility and another way of being. And I still believe there are those in the publishing industry who are in this for more than just the profit motive - those agents (like mine!), editors, booksellers, etc., who are committed to the young people they serve. The young people we all serve.

Carrie Jones and Megan Kelley Hall recently started Young Adult Authors Against Bullying on Facebook. While I haven't joined the group (this deserves a more complicated post on my relationship with Fb), I whole-heartedly support their efforts. Where some of us might have called it "the way things are" at one point, the issue now has a name--a place to begin. And that helps all our children. In a world of power ab/use where we are pitted against one another in complex ways, addressing power inequities has to start somewhere - and with young minds.

Consuming Hunger

I was folding laundry the other night and flipped through the handful of channels we get (we have no cable - *on purpose*). I settled on a talk show before realizing it was the Wendy Williams Show :P. But I stayed there because Suze Ormon was about to come on and I believe in synchronicity. How strange that I'd been thinking about finances lately and then, voila! - Suze. I used to watch her years ago (clearly I learned nothing from her words of wisdom) and loved how passionate she was about helping women with their finances. And this time, she was the same, feisty, passionate Suze. Only on this show, she came out. Loud and proud and vocal. And she even stated her thoughts on gay marriage and allowed the show to display a picture of her and her partner. LOVE it.

And then, I thought about my own spending habits. I'm not a big spender. I cut my own hair and I've stopped colouring it now for about three/four years. But, it's spring and April has thrown us a few surprises - flip-flop days. I-wish-the-pool-was-open-NOW days. And the mega shopping complex down the hill has been swarmed by folks looking for summery clothes and shoes, getting lattes from Starbux, and eating lunch at Olive Garden or Applebee's, or whatever that place is that beckons to families on budgets, promising five dollar meals. And I love me some iced lattes on hot days and pretty toe rings and flip-flops and cute dresses. But I rein in a lot of those wants. Most of my peeps don't.

The mega shopping complex down the hill. It plopped down a few years ago, *directly* across from the projects. I've read study after study where they show the buying stats of people of colour and women. We are the most avid consumers on the market. Of anything. Food, clothes, gym memberships, cosmetics, books, music, cars...you name it. We buy sh@t. We buy LOTS of sh@t. Most of the time, we buy stuff that we use for a few minutes, then never look at again.

The entire fashion industry knows how much buying power women have. So does the diet and exercise industry. And the cosmetics industry. And the cosmetic surgery industry. These are giant, multi-gazillion-dollar industries that bank on the low self-esteem and high buying power of women.

The fact that a Super Target set up shop directly across the street from the projects indicates that the folks who run these things know where their dollars are coming from, too.

And then it hit me again, every time I think about these things: people consume when they are hungry.

I've put a new mandate up on my cork board. I will not consume anything that is devoid of nutritional value - for my body, emotions, and soul. And I will make sure that everything I create, everything I write, has nutritional value, too. I've always done that intuitively, but now I will do it consciously. Even if I'm writing mostly fluff, it will be nutritional fluff .

Spring Equinox/New Year

An old and dear friend sent an email around announcing the United Nations' recognition of the spring equinox holiday celebrated by Parsi Zoroastrians around the world as the beginning of the new year. March 21st is spring equinox for all, but for 300 million worldwide it is also the beginning of a new year.

Here are a few links with more information:

UN General Assembly Recognizes 21 March as International Day of Nowruz UN Officially Recognizes March 21 as International Nowruz Day UN Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon Urges Harmony on First International Day of NowruzMy new year is yours: I had no idea others celebrated Navroze by Kayhan Irani (2004)

Reflections

I grew up thinking it was a matter of course that women can and should lead nations. In my home, we discussed and debated the policies of Indira Gandhi, Benazir Bhutto, and Margaret Thatcher. All women prime ministers during my lifetime. It never ocurred to me that this was something remarkable. Until I started looking at the history of Canada and the US. In the entire histories of these nations, both the US and Canada have never had a female leader - especially ironic to me, as I grew up with media stereotypes of the submissive, demure, exotic Asian female.

I understood pretty early how important it is to SEE role models - images and actual sightings of folks who look like you taking up space, speaking up, making decisions, holding seats of power.

Yesterday, Coe Booth, Sarah Darer Littman, Maryrose Wood and I read from our books at the Bronx Library Center. The auditorium we were in held over one hundred students from the Bronx. Over eighty percent of them were brown. Maybe even closer to ninety percent. I thought of how important it was for them to see two brown women on the stage, reading from works that focused on experiences these students could relate to - expressing worldviews these students knew well. Whether they knew it or not, we were creating a window for them to what was Possible. They could then see *themselves* up on a stage, where there was room for their expressions, their words, their image.

And I thought of how important it was for them to hear us voicing into reality the things they struggle with, real issues they face - particularly with the flurry of questions Sarah got over her upcoming book on a girl's relationship with an internet predator. These young men and women were hungry for what is REAL. What they know in their bones.

I wondered how many times these same students would sit through similar readings with absolutely NO reflection of their realities. No recognition that they exist at all. And that, of course, is precisely what they experience when they watch TV, or open a mainstream magazine, or peruse many of the books in large chain bookstores.

Still. Yesterday, they got to see and hear a diverse panel of women authors. And that, at least for now, is something.

Women Writers of Colour Series

Today, I'm featured on Color Online's Women Writers of Colour series. The whole series is awesome with some wonderful and diverse voices - go check it out!

In Honour of International Women's Day

In honour of IWD (International Women's Day) which is on March 8th this year and Women's History Month, I'm putting up Sheila Chandra's "call", La Sagesse (Women, I'm Calling You). Just click on the play button below.

The image below is of Mukhtaran Bibi who was gang raped in an "honour" revenge issued by tribal council. She was expected to have committed suicide after this, but took the case to court instead. The perpetrators were charged and arrested, and later acquitted. Nonetheless, she started an organization to empower girls and women in Pakistan, called Mukhtar Mai's Women's Welfare Organization. There is an image of the accused rapists on the Wiki page (link above) and I debated putting it up here - to plaster their faces in public. But I don't know if men who were given orders to rape a woman by tribal council would see their actions as shameful since the actions were condoned and blessed by those in power, and the men have yet to be brought to justice. So I chose not to, focusing instead on the remarkable strength and courage of the woman who is inspiring all young girls and women who hear her story.

Here is a recent account of the status of this case is this from Wiki:

"On December 11, 2008 Mukhtaran was informed by Sardar Abdul Qayyum, the sitting Federal Minister for Defence Production, to drop the charge against the accused. According to Mukhtaran, the minister called her uncle, Ghulam Hussain, to his place in Jatoi and passed on a message to Mukhtaran that she should drop the charges against the thirteen accused of the Mastoi tribe, who were involved either in the verdict against Mukhtaran, or who gang raped her. The minister said that if she did not comply, he and his associates would not let the Supreme Court’s decision go in favour of Mukhtaran. It is believed that the Mastoi clan have political influence of sufficient weight to bring pressure to bear on the supreme court via establishment and political figures.
The Supreme Court of Pakistan had listed Mukhtaran case for hearing in the 2nd week of February 2009 (hearing was expected on 10th or 11th February).^[35]
On June 11, 2009, the Multan Electric Power Company raided the MMWWO (Mukhtar Mai's Women Welfare Organization) in Meerwala, Pakistan, disconnecting all electricity to the grounds, falsely accusing the organization of stealing electricity despite records proving they have paid all bills in full. MMWWO and hundreds of families in the surrounding area were without power for several days. Today, while the power to the surrounding area has been restored, the MMWWO grounds, which house the Mukhtaran Girls Model School, Women's Resource Centre, and Shelter Home for battered women (whose premises was raided despite the fact that men are strictly prohibited), are still enduring blistering temperatures. According to MMWWO employees, who were witnesses, the power company officials claimed that the raid was ordered by Abdul Qayyum Jatoi, the Federal Minister for Defense Production. This raid has significantly hindered the ability of Mai's organization to carry out its' important human rights work, providing services for vulnerable women, girls and boys.^[36]
Hearings for the Supreme Court case have repeatedly been delayed, while her attackers remain imprisoned and her case is pending."

Sex, "Bad Girls" and Healing

I've been taking some time out to do a bit of healing. As women, we have a lot to heal from. There is the usual, everyday sexism, then there is media travesty, and then there are facts like 1 in 4 girls is sexually abused before the age of eighteen (often by someone they know). As women who are working class, or grew up working class, we have quite a lot to heal from. As women of colour who are, or grew up working class, what we need to heal from increases exponentially...with layer upon layer to peel back. And then we get to all the regular stuff--the stuff that *everyone* has to heal from. Things like my rabbit died when I was five, or the teacher called me stupid, or everyone laughed at me in eighth grade, or I was an uber-geek with bad acne in high school...

So, that's clearly a whole LOT of healing that needs to happen--and most of it has to get squeezed in between work and relationships and family and money and Life and, and, and.

I've been sitting on a post about race that I've just been too tired to put up. I will at some point, but for now I am quieting down and trying to get back in touch with that little voice that disappears if I don't keep listening to it.

In the meantime, Colleen has another What A Girl Wants post up at Chasing Ray. This one is about sex and the concept of the "bad girl". Here's a quote from my portion:

"What's stunningly clear as you read [Natalie Angier's WOMAN: AN INTIMATE GEOGRAPHY] is that humans have been the only species to stifle female sexuality throughout the ages--in the myriad ways we have. From confining the body by shoving it into clothing items not designed for actual, life-sized females, to shaming women for expressing natural sexual urges, to publicly humiliating women (or worse, putting them to death) for adultery while their husbands openly took lovers, we--as a human race--have suppressed female sexuality beyond recognition. And I mean that literally. Most women wouldn't recognize our own natural, unfettered sexuality if we sat on it."

 Here's a bit from Zetta's quote:

"So many girls learn early on that sex is about pleasing your partner, and the emphasis on virginity leads even young girls to engage in oral sex and other practices for which they are not ready. I think girls understand early on that sex is about power, but they don’t know how to exist as a sexual being so that they are empowered and not used, abused, or shamed."

Go read what the other women have to say on the topic, too! This week it's Sara Ryan, Beth Kephart, Laurel Snyder, Lorie Ann Grover, Zetta Elliott, and myself. It's a great read with lots of wonderful book suggestions.

Books I've Cherished

I'm following Zetta's lead and taking the Diversity Roll Call: Paradigm Shifts assignment posted over at Color Online:

Several books come immediately to mind when I think of works that shifted the way I see things--that made an impact on my life's decisions: SISTER OUTSIDER, by Audre Lorde; THE HOUSE ON MANGO STREET, by Sandra Cisneros; MEAN SPIRIT, by Linda Hogan; WOMAN ON THE EDGE OF TIME, by Marge Piercy; The FREE RENUNCIATES trilogy by Marion Zimmer Bradley; SHATTERED GLASS, by Elaine Bergstrom; and WILD SEED, by Octavia Butler.

All of these are adult books that were written before there was a category for YA. But I certainly read them when I was a YA, and they had a tremendous impact on who I became and how I saw the world around me.

SISTER OUTSIDER began my journey into looking at the world through a Black feminist lens. It opened me up to works by June Jordan, bell hooks, Dionne Brand, Cherie Moraga, Joy Kagawa, Minnie Bruce Pratt, Jeanette Winterson, Dorothy Allison, the rest of Ms. Lorde's writings, and many other unapologetic feminists of colour -- women whose words gave me ways to express aspects of myself I'd never thought could be valued.

THE HOUSE ON MANGO STREET was the first book I read in print that seemed so utterly accessible. It showed me my heart, my innermost thoughts and feelings on a page where someone else wrote the words. I was simply amazed that this was possible. I loved the characters in this book -- felt like I knew them; that most of them were family.

MEAN SPIRIT blew my world apart. The writing, the magnitude and scope of the events Ms. Hogan described, and the sheer devastation of what this particular community experienced was a shattering revelation. I had read lots of non-fiction about the history of the Americas, and spent long nights chatting with First Nations friends and colleagues, and I thought I was pretty knowledgeable on the issues and topics. But when I read this book, I realized what a difference it makes reading about these types of events through story. Through fiction. And through the eyes of characters that live and breathe on the page. It was an ambitious undertaking, and Ms. Hogan did it masterfully. In my opinion, this book is one of the most brilliant and under-valued gems of fiction--multicultural or otherwise. It should be a MUST READ in every class that looks at literature by marginalized voices, and any and every class that studies American history.

WOMAN ON THE EDGE OF TIME was shoved into my hands by a close friend. "READ THIS," she said. And I did, non-stop from the moment I opened the book. I had never read a work of feminist science-fiction before this book. I was amazed at Ms. Piercy's imagination, and her feminist commentary woven throughout the narrative. It was the first time I discovered that feminism and a social commentary could be merged with not only fiction (I'd discovered this with Audre Lorde's book), but with science-fiction. I was hooked.

The FREE RENUNCIATES trilogy and SHATTERED GLASS were books I read rather close together. Like Piercy's novel, both of these books showed me how magical feminism threaded through fantasy could be for young readers like myself. It was the first time I was seeing kick-ass heroines who needed no saving, who were out there finding their own destinies and who were shaping the world around them. SHATTERED GLASS was the first feminist vampire novel I'd ever read. The protagonist was a strong woman who was unashamed of her own sexuality and sensuality, and matched the men around her in power and ability. The concepts Ms. Bergstrom used in this novel, i.e. "vegetarian" vampires (who don't prey on humans) are the same ones Meyers later used in her mega-hit series.

And last (but certainly not least!), is Butler's WILD SEED. This book was a merging of all of the above, and really set the bar for every feminist, socially conscious fantasy/sci-fi novel I've read since. I found this book at a center for LGBTQ folks during a meeting, and started flipping through. By the end of the meeting, I was a third of the way through and could not put it down. I smuggled it home, read it that night, then smuggled it back the next day. Bad, I know. But such is the power of Ms. Butler's work. In WILD SEED, I saw characters and story and socially conscious narrative elevated to well beyond an art. I was completely absorbed in the story of these two "lovers." Their story was as epic and sweeping as any romance novel or Bollywood film, but there were layers of profound insight and revelations that struck at the very core of my belief systems. It's a book and experience I've absolutely cherished.

All of these books and authors have influenced my own work in some way. I am indebted to all of them, and so many others for breaking ground, fighting tirelessly to make way so that stories like mine and those of other marginalized voices could make their way into the world.

Thoughts on Avatar

I wasn't sure I wanted to go, really, and fought feelings of not wanting to support another Dances With Wolves type of film that exalted the redemption of White Male Saviour. And Avatar certainly had that. I went fully expecting to hate it because of everything I'd read from respected colleagues and friends. And I'm far from being a Cameron fan -- though my guess is that, as usual, he had tons of input from plenty of other creative minds (who will, most likely, never get credit for it).

Could be that my expectations were so low, but I came out of the theater loving the movie. That's right, I said it: "loving." The movie was visually stunning--which I expected. After all, a budget of four hundred million dollars and a shooting location in Hawaii should buy you some pretty shots, shouldn't it?

[**WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD** ]

But I found the film to be slightly more than the racial cow-patty it has been in some discourses. It absolutely has that element--I'm not disputing it. That part DID annoy me. And maybe if I had gone in not knowing I'd encounter that, I'd be more enraged. But as it was, I went in expecting to be offended. But I was far less offended than I thought I'd be.

Don't get me wrong -- I'm not excusing the inherent white male fantasy in the film. There was a most gag-worthy scene where these gorgeous, neon, jelly-fish type of "seeds" from a sacred soul-tree drifted onto the main character, Jake Sully, and settled on his skin, covering his arms, face, and torso and creating a very Jesus-like image. And of course, it was the white male channeled through the Na'vi who rode the biggest dragon in to save the day. So, if you go, DO be prepared for that. And the argument that all the main PoC characters are painted in blue throughout the entire film is totally valid. But, again, I went in knowing all this, so I wasn't surprised and didn't feel the need to retch as soon as I got out of the theater.

So, having said all that... there were some things I was truly impressed with -- not just because my expectations were significantly lowered, but because no one has really touched on these in a lot of the conversations I've been privy to:

1) The women were kickass. Neytiri (played by Zoe Saldana) was FIERCE. If this was a film I could take my girls to (can't, they're too young), I would LOVE for them to see Neytiri. Why can't we have more Neytiris on celluloid? On covers of books? On television? She was strong, full of integrity, beautiful, sensual, confident, protective, nurturing, and did I mention FIERCE? Her number one priority was her people. She didn't just see this exotic white boy and fall madly, deeply in love; completely and utterly giving up her own destiny and her people. Her allegiance was clear from the first moment she met the outsider -- who, for the record, looked *exactly* like her people because he was a hybrid, an inter-species mix of human and Na'vi. Neytiri is totally my shero. She could fight. She knew how to tame and ride a horse AND a dragon. And she didn't need anyone to save her. In fact, she was the saviour, in the end. NOT the white male.

In fact, I'm trying to remember if there was a negative female portrayal at all, and my mind is drawing a blank. The scientist, the pilot, Neytiri, her mother . . . all intense, powerful, principaled women.

2) The spiritual sensibility woven throughout the film. The idea of ancestral connection really resonated with me. This is a concept I grew up with as an Indian woman, a Sikh woman. It's a concept indigenous peoples all over the world are intimately familiar with. And it's a basic Truth of life that the west is only now, perhaps, beginning to embrace. But nonetheless, it's an important concept that should, in my opinion, be incorporated into daily life.

All of the spiritual threads hit home for me. The idea of real, biological connections between the earth, animals, plants, and humans; the concept of Earth as mother (there is an old Bollywood film called Mother India in which Dharti Maa -- Mother Earth -- is repetitively enforced throughout); the idea of energy flow among all living things.

And the fact that all of the spiritual elements were led and upheld by women were another point of resonance. Something I rarely see in mainstream media in any form. In fact, spirituality that is not reduced to a tool of capitalism is something not often portrayed in mainstream media.

3) The exalting of collaborative effort over individual gain. This was a value of the Navi (who seemed to be a mix of indigenous cultures from all over the globe, but a most identifiable similarity was with the Maasai of Eastern Africa--the dress, body type, jewelry, etc.). Connection was a sacred belief. That we are all a connected, bonded network, and what happens to one, affects us all.

5) There was some obvious critique of colonization. Those of us who are aware of the horrors of colonization and imperialism were, in all likelihood, not shocked by the destruction of Pandora at the hands of the colonizers. But for people who never have to face these realities, it very likely was a revelation. And there were clear references to the Bush agenda and approach to foreign relations throughout.

When I left the theater, I caught an older white woman's conversation on her cell phone: "Oh, my gawd, it was horrible. SO depressing, I can't even talk about it." [think Long Island accent]

I wracked my brain to find where the depressing part was, and the only thing I could come up with was the devastation of colonization. Because to me, the end was somewhat inspiring. And the whole film was about resistance--relentless, unceasing resistance which culminates in ultimate victory for those under siege. How unusual to see that in a Hollywood film--particularly when the enemy is a depiction of the American military (for contrast, see this site for a detailed timeline of Paramount's casting decisions for the upcoming film, Airbender. The villains are all PoC, and the heroes are all white).

In the end, this is the way I see it: if we want films (books) to truly and accurately represent us, we need to own our own production houses (publishing houses). There are enough of us out there who are gainfully employed that getting together and starting something could be a reality. But, instead of doing that, we spend all of our energy elbowing our way into the Big House.

This is one film from the Big House that actually got some things right. It got some things wrong, too, but that is to be expected when we are not at the reins, no? It wasn't an independent production. Its aim was to appeal to the masses. And yet, it still portrayed some unpopular ways of looking at life, women, spirituality, American militarism, the Bush agenda, colonization and imperialism. When we're looking to others to represent us, then we have to keep fighting for them to get it right. OR, we can say, "You know what? Fark you. You keep screwing up, so I'm doing my own sh*t."

And since none of us have done that yet (on the scale of Twentienth Century Fox), I'm going to say that I loved this film for what it did get right. Plus, I am a serious sucker for awesome special effects. I was able to get over Keanu's gawd-awful acting and the White Male Saviour concept for the Matrix trilogy for similar reasons.

But the stuff that Avatar did get right is now being viewed by the masses--teenagers who are addicted to female heroines like Bella from Twilight (please don't let my daughters ever try to emulate her), construction workers and wall street types who couldn't give two craps about spirituality, waitresses and lawyers who spend more money on their fingernails and hair than they do on healthy food. All kinds of people are going to see this movie, and it is showing some important perspectives not normally portrayed on the big screen. Or any screen, for that matter. And I, for one, think that is pretty cool.

There is so much more to say on this film and the issues it raises, or doesn't raise, and I'd love to engage in dialogue with others who've seen it. Feel free to comment or email.

Oh--one more thing: if you're going to see it, you MUST see it in 3D. The cinematography is something to be experienced.